Mad Hilarities

Dead babies:

Why'd the Baby cross the road?
It was stappled to the chiken..

How do you get a baby to stop running around in circles?
Nail its other hand to the ground..

Whats funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down's syndrome..

What happened when I put a baby in the microwave?
Dunno either... I was too busy jerking off...

How do you get a baby into a shoe box?
-with a blender..
How do you get it out?
-With a straw.....

The emo song

dear diary,
mood: apathetic
my life is spiraling downward. i couldn't get enough money to go to the Blood Red Romance and Suffocate Me Dry Concert. It sucks cause they play some of my favorite songs like 'Stab My Heart Because I Love You,' and 'Rip Apart My Soul,' and of course, 'Stabby Rip Stab Stab." and it doesn't help that i couldn't get my hair to do that flippy thing either, like that guy from that band could do, some days you know. . .

i'm an emo kid, non-conforming as can be
you'd be non-conforming to if u look just like me
i have paint on my nails and make-up on my face
i'm almost emo enough to start shaving my legs
'cause i feel real deep when i'm dressing in drag
i call it freedom of expression most just call me a fag
'cause their dudes look like chicks, their chicks look like dykes
'cause emo is one step below transvestite

stop my breathing and slit my throat
i must be emo
i don't jump around when i go to shows
i must be emo

i'm dark and sensitive with low self-esteem
the way i dress makes everyday feel like Hallowe'en
i have no real problems but i like to make believe
i stole my sister's mascara now i'm grounded for a week
sulking and writing poetry are my hobbies
i can't get through a Hawthorne Heights album without sobbing
girls keep breaking up with me, it's never any fun
they say they already have a pussy, they don't need another one

stop my breathing and slit my throat
i must be emo
i don't jump around when i go to shows
i must be emo
dye in my hair and polish on my toes
i must be emo
i play guitar and write suicide notes
i must be emo

my life is just a black abyss, you know, it's so dark. and it's suffocating me. grabbing ahold of me and tightening it's grip, tighter than a pair of my little sister's jeans . . . which look great on my by the way

when i get depressed i cut my wrists in every direction
hearing songs about getting dumped give me an erection
i write in a live journal and wear thick rimmed glasses
i told my friends i bleed black and cry during classes
i'm just a bad, cheap imitation of goth
you can read me "Catcher in the Rye," and watch me jack off
i wear skin tight clothes while hating my life
if i said i like girls i'd only be half right

i look like i'm dead and dress like a homo
i must be emo
screw XBOX i play old school Nintendo
i must be emo
i like to whine and hate my parentals
i must be emo
me and my friends all look like clones
i must be emo

my parents just don't get me you know. they think i'm gay just because they saw me kiss a guy. well, a couple of guys. but i mean, it's the 2000s. can't 2, or 4 dudes make-out with each other without being gay. i mean, chicks dig that kind of thing anyways. i don't know diary, sometimes i think you're the only one that gets me, you're my best friend. . . . i feel like tacos

...

I heard a story just the other day, a story that I could not believe. A story about your mother, how she goes down on her knees. The guys downstairs, say that she can do it realy well, How does it feel... to know your mother sucks cocks in hell? ...No hater cried, the day that your mother died. She didnt get into heaven, she got a (smthn...smthng continued) at the seven eleven. I know her soul will never rest, now shes in hell .....smthn.... your mother sucks cocks in hell, your mother sucks cocks in hell, it was a gift from god that she does real well, your mother sucks cocks in hell...Im hearing things, thing that I did not know, that your mother could suck a basketball through a gutted hose. Your mother sucks cocks, your mother sucks cocks, yout mother sucks cocks in hell

THC= the happy chemical

Hattie

Sucker love is heaven sent,
Puker up, our passions spent.
My hearts a tart, your body's rent.
My body is broken yours is bent

Carve your name into my arm,
instead of stressed, I lie here charmed,
Coz there's nothing else to do
Every me and every you.

Sucker love, a box i chose,
No other box I chose to use.
Another love I would abuse
no circumstances could excuse.

In the shape of things to come,
To much poison come undone.
Coz there's nothing else to do,
Every me and every you.

Sucker love in known to swing,
Prone to cling and waste these things.
Pucker up for heavens sake,
There's never been so much at stake.

I serve my head up on a plate
Its only comfort calling late,
Coz there's nothing else to do
Every me and every you

Like the naked leads the blind,
I know Im selfish, im unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.

All alone in space and time,
There's nothing here but whats here's mine.
Something borrowed, something blue
Every me and Every you.

Dreams

Oh! that my young life were a lasting dream!
My spirit not awakening, till the beam
Of an Eternity should bring the morrow.
Yes! though that long dream were of hopeless sorrw.

Shock Therapy

Dopamine

Dopamine is a chemical naturally produced by our body, that controls feelings of euphoria, pleasure, excitement and contentment, as well as many others. It is the chemical that allows us to feel satisfied after eating etc. An excess of the flow of this chemical can be the result of exposure to drugs such as Marijuana, which hightens the dopamine release resulting in emphatic feelings and sensations.